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  林深拿到了那個獎盃,將它放在桌上,然後扶了扶麥。他先是用屬於這座城市這個國家的語言進行了簡短的問好,就算是講不太熟悉的義大利語也十分動聽。

  緊接著,他開始發表正式的獲獎感言。

  「This is not the first time I have come to Venice, nor is it the first time I have stood here. This is the city that witnessed my honor and loss. There are people I want to thank sitting on the stage. Whether it's all the cast members of "The Mocker" or my own team, they have brought me a lot. This trophy is engraved not only with my name, but also with their name.(這不是我第一次來到威尼斯,也不是我第一次站在這裡。這是見證了我榮譽和失落的城市,這裡的台下,坐著我想要感謝的人。無論是《嘲弄者》的所有劇組成員,還是我自己的團隊,他們都帶給了我很多很多,這個獎盃上刻著的不僅是我的名字,更是他們的名字。)」

  林深指了一下大屏幕,「(He Yizhi in The Mocker is a man without faith. I used to be the same, but I've been thinking about what faith is. Buddhism says that everything is false in the eyes and ears, and the infinite Buddhist Dharma is true. Christians say that they endure hardships before they die and hope for eternal life behind them. Politicians of all kinds publicize their policies and numerous artists render their aesthetics.《嘲弄者》中的何亦折是一個沒有信仰的人,我曾經也是一樣,但我一直在思考信仰是什麼。佛教說眼中耳中皆是假,無邊佛法才是真,基督徒說忍受生前困苦,希冀身後永生,各種政治家宣揚自身政策,無數藝術家渲染自身美學。)」

  「They show various forms of belief, so what is belief in the end How can we define beliefs if we can't find the inner essence of them if there are so many superficial forms?(他們展現了信仰的各種表現形式,那麼信仰到底是什麼呢?浮於表面的形式再多,可要是找不到內在實質,我們又該怎樣去定義信仰?)」林深說到這裡笑著感嘆,「It really lacks commonality and is different for everyone. It can reach a consensus that allows a group to be intimately interdependent.(它確實缺乏共性,對於每個人不盡相同。它可以達成共識,讓一個團體親密相依。)」

  林深頓了一下繼續說道,「If we look at it this way, none of us can define it, but we can express it, seize it and love it.(如果這樣看,我們沒有一個人可以定義它,但是我們卻可以去表現它,抓住它,熱愛它。)」

  「I just said that I had no faith because I thought it was useless, because I only thought of myself as the whole, because movies were enough to make up my life.(我剛才說我曾經沒有信仰,因為我覺得它根本無用,因為我只將我自己當做全部,因為電影已經足夠構成我的人生。)」

  「But now, I have 插nged, people will always encounter their own gods, the day I met, my heart suddenly lost order and no longer stable, I thought it was the body was unfaithful to me, but in fact, it is only my mind determined to abandon their pride and bias, it has to find a support for themselves.(可是現在,我已經改變了,人總會遇到自己的神明,遇見的那一天我心臟忽然失去秩序不再穩定,我以為這是身體對我不忠,但實際上這只不過是我的思想下定決心背棄自己的驕傲和偏頗,它要為自己尋覓一個支撐。)」

  他緊接著這句話揚起眉峰。

  「It seems a bit too literary to say that. I am worried that the media reporters who are known as the uncrowned king will misunderstand me, so I intend to be more sincere and simple.(這麼說似乎有些過於文藝化,我很擔心那些被譽為無冕之王的媒體記者們會誤解我的意思,所以我打算再赤誠再簡單一些。)」

  林深從上面向下看,他知道賀呈陵在看他,他知道,因為他的心跳再次不忠於自己,只是為另外一個人的存在而心跳加速。

  「My lover has just confessed to me here that he can't bear me to accept criticism and refuse to say my name, but I don't care about prejudices. I want to tie our destiny together and Atropos can't cut it off.(我的戀人剛才在這裡對我表白,他不忍心我因此收到非議而不願說出我的名字,但我並不在乎那些偏見,我要讓我們的命運緊緊捆綁在一起,阿特洛波斯也無法剪斷。)」

  「我現在有信仰了,我是賀呈陵主義者。」

  他最後,這樣說。

  馬爾克斯說,「即使以為自己的感情已經乾涸得無法給予,也總會有一個時刻一樣東西能撥動心靈深處的弦;我們畢竟不是生來就享受孤獨的。」

  我們都不會孤獨。

  我們都會被深愛。

  這是我的信仰。

  ————正文完————

  2019.9.21

  作者有話要說: 注釋君:

  (1)《聖經》中的那一句來自《舊約.以賽亞書》第40 章。

  (2)阿特洛波斯,命運三女神之一,掌管死亡,負責切斷生命之線。

  接下來更番外,有什麼好的點可以告訴我哦

  第86章 番外:惡時辰┃生活只不過是不斷給人一些機會,好讓人能活下去。

  『生活只不過是不斷給人一些機會, 好讓人能活下去。——加西亞-馬爾克斯《惡時辰》』

  愛德華咖啡廳里, 林深取出手機看了一眼時間, 已經是下午六點二十八分。

  他看了看自己身上穿著的紅色長裙,覺得答應了夏克琳的軟磨硬泡幫盧卡斯學生們要排的話劇客串賣花的小女孩簡直是一個錯誤。




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